If I asked what the most significant memories of your teenage years were, would you mention a trip away with your family, school or youth group? Memories of trips away might trigger emotions of unexpected joy, sadness or complete chaos (likewise for any youth worker who has led a trip away). Taking young people away on trips is one of the most important aspects of youth ministry. While trips can be costly and involve a lot of stress, sweat and sometimes tears, they can be hugely memorable and can help reinforce good youth work that has taken place all year round.
This summer I took five young people from my church to Lee Abbey, a Christian community and holiday venue on the beautiful Devon coast. We joined in with Camp 2 for 13- to 18-year-olds, with over 90 young people gathering from across Europe. The theme of the camp was ‘Follow’ with two main meetings per day, each creatively exploring different ways we could follow Jesus.
I was a tent co-leader with another adult. Before breakfast, we would meet as a group and held tent prayers. After getting to know the lads, it became clear to me that each would align themselves with the Christian faith, but during tent prayers they were reluctant to pray together. After the third day of awkward silence, I couldn’t help but feel those meetings weren’t ‘successful’.
While it would be misguided of me to suggest that getting young people to pray is the ultimate goal of any youth minister, there is a sense in which this has value (see Matthew 21:15,16). As the week went on, our relationships grew stronger and I chose to share a serious personal situation that I was concerned about. Following that, all the lads surprised me by praying with real honesty and depth about this. I couldn’t help but leave that tent prayers far more positive than any of the others. During the rest of the camp I couldn’t help but consider the role of honesty in youth ministry.
My deepest belief about any youth ministry is that it is only as good as the relationships that are formed within it. Relationships are the vehicle for youth ministry and what my Lee Abbey experience taught me is that honesty is the fuel.
Youth ministers should never be the bridge between any young person and God. Any attempt on my part to be a bridge between the two would only result in me becoming a stumbling block. I once heard spirituality defined as ‘our response to God’s call’. This reminds me that God is the major agent in creating disciples; he calls young people to him and my role is to create space for that young person to hear and respond to that call. Within that space, honesty is one of the most precious commodities. At first, this idea might appear to gloss over Christ, but if what Jesus says about himself is true, that he is the way, the truth and the life, then wherever you encounter honesty you are, in fact, encountering Christ.
During the camp I felt honesty was like a currency that we all had, that we could either keep to ourselves or be generous with. During leaders meetings we were encouraged to share positive stories about the young people and camp life, mostly these featured an element of a young person ‘opening up’ and sharing how the young person was really feeling. This was rightly greeted with applause and reinforced my reflections. All this reminded me of a challenging quote I read by the theologian Walter Brueggemann: ‘Churches should be the most honest place in town, not the happiest place in town.’
John’s Gospel tells us that Jesus arrived full of grace and truth (John 1:14). Youth workers can be considered compassionate people and therefore generally good at creating graceful spaces. However, I think we struggle with creating truthful spaces. It’s hard to create that divine mix of support (grace) and challenge (truth), but I think our culture reveals that truth is a precious commodity and as youth ministers we must do our best to give it the greatest chance of permeating the groups we serve. So maybe the significance of trips isn’t in the places we go together, but in the honesty we reveal, and perhaps the act of revealing who we really are is the truth that will set us free.
Tim Broadbent is Youth and Children’s Minister at St Mary’s Upper Street, Islington and enjoys watching Crystal Palace and films.